How Men Talk, And Don’t Listen
|
|
|
Men tend to perceive conversation w/ mates while a form of competition or challenge-like playing office politics or jockeying for position inside the passing lane. When we’re asked a question, we do not just answer; we want to offer the right answer (or the right excuse). If talking turns inside a debate or argument, naturally we want to win it. If the conversation revolves around our partner’s problems, 9 times out of 10, we’ll move inside advice-giving mode, trying to come up w/ solutions to the puzzle laid out before everybody. Our adversarial attitude toward conversation is not just mental; it’s physical, too. Conversation can become while stressful while any physical challenge men face inside life. It actually quickens our heart rates and causes our temperatures to rise. Left unchecked, our impulse to wrestle w/ conversation can also cause tempers to rise and very quickly lead a conversation inside the not-so-gentle realm of full-blown argument. But it does not have to become that way. It’s the basic nature of men to equate the rigors of conversation w/ too many physical challenges. We do not talk about stuff; we do stuff. We’re hands-on, proactive. Men have their identities from their achievements, not their relationships. Thus, we have a impenetrable time simply having a talk, empathizing w/ a partner, commiserating w/ her. We need to talk to have a point or a goal, or to address a concrete issue that can become solved w/ advice and specific actions. This is just the opposite of what women crave. Usually, all they want is to feel that you have heard them, regardless of whether your conversation comes to a specific resolution. That’s not the only way we differ inside conversational style. Just for your own edification, here are sum other examples that reveal our competitive leanings when it comes to conversation. Men issue commands; women make requests. For example, a man will say Close the door, while a woman will ask, Will you please close the door? This gives men power and makes women seem subservient. While women initiate conversations, men interrupt a lot too many and thus gain control of the discussion. Inside conversation, men like to offer information, not have it. This, from the way, is why we do not like to ask for directions. So inside summary, men really do need to learn how to just listen too many. This will do wonders for scoring brownie points inside courting women. Inside the mean time, Great Luck!
OR if you would like to receive a FREE copy of a limited number of the eGuide “Instant Magnetic Attraction and discover. What do Women Really Want From MenÂ, check out www.secrets2datingsuccess.com
About the Author
Terry Leslie is a successful and world renowned authority figure on creating and maintaining successful relationships. A much sought after global speaker inside the areas of intimate relationships, self-improvement and human peak potential training. For too many Secrets to Dating and Relationship success, check out www.secrets2datingsuccess.com